Fire & Motion 38
The magic you are looking for is in the work you are avoiding.
From the perspective of noise reduction, a singular decision is a recurrent decision that happens only once. Whether you make a decision only once or a hundred times, your goal should be to make it in a way that reduces both bias and noise. And practices that reduce error should be just as effective in your one-of-a-kind decisions as in your repeated ones.
First, assume that your first estimate is of the mark. Second, think about a few reasons why that could be. Which assumptions and considerations could have been wrong? Third, what do these new considerations imply? Was the first estimation rather too high or too low? Fourth, based on this new perspective, make a second, alternative estimate.
When do you feel confident in a judgement? Two conditions must be satisfied: the story you believe must be comprehensively coherent, and there must be no attractive alternatives.
Favor relative judgements and relative scales. Relative judgements are less noisy than absolute ones, because our ability to categorize objects on a scale is limited, while our ability to make pairwise comparisons is much better.
Few practices have come to my mind during the second visit of the book. Usually, people only encounter once-in-a-lifetime decision, but the method of decision hygiene still applied. By evaluating the assumptions and making relative judgements, one can achieve a better decision quality. And finally, the confidence of our judgements isn't from the procedures itself, but from the stories we tell ourselves: the 100% one, and the 0% others.
The key, as in any relationship, is how you handle other's anger. When what you say hurts, acknowledge the other person's pain. Don't pretend it doesn't hurt or say it "shouldn't" hurt, just show you care. Eliminate the phrase "don't take it personally" from your vocabulary, it's insulting. Instead, offer to help fix the problem. But don't pretend it isn't a problem just to try to make somebody feel better. In the end, caring personally about people even as you challenge them will build the best relationships of your career.
"How long do you spend making sure you have all the facts right before you criticize somebody? How long do you spend making sure you have all the facts right before you praise somebody?" Ideally, you'd spend just as long getting the facts right for praise as for criticism.
Care with sincerity and offer help. Criticize under sufficient information.
People will avoid an action or an experience in protection to how much it threatens their identity and their world view. The resistance to change is proportional to how fundamental something is to how we see ourselves, and how we view the world.
Happiness is great, but it's kind of blah, because it means nothing needs to change.
If there's no reason to do anything, there's also no reason to not do anything.
Since being changed is one of the essential parts of one's identity, pursuing happiness may not always be proper destination to settle life down. Also reinforce my perspective that procrastination not only means you care too much, but also means one's identity is under certain amount of pressure. As a counter-intuitive choice and the last piece of my Netflix journey, the documentary does show a different pathway that can lead to a better calibration of oneself. Merci Netflix! You've been great :)
There aren't many times in a lifetime when you know you're right and you know you have one that's really going to work wonderfully. Maybe five or six times in a lifetime you get a chance to do it. People who do it two or three times early, all go broke because they think it's easy. In fact, it's very hard and rare.
You work at it. You do a lot of reading, thinking, and visiting.
A beautiful post to remember Charlie.
距離上一篇 Fire & Motion 37 有好長一段時間，這段期間有許多變化，以致於生活在 hustle 中度過而無心顧及閱讀。開始新工作了、要搬家了、要離開台北了、要開始數位游牧了。期許自己在接下來的變化中依然做好最基本的事，也期許在流離的過程中始終在場。
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